Snowboarders are the biggest party animals on earth.  That was up until I hung out with a big Vietnamese clan of men in Saigon consisting of close friends and family.  Never in my life have I ever eaten and drank so much.  Cases of Heineken are gone within an hour and after the beers are put down, then comes the Remy Martin and Chivas.  It was great.  But a distant second are the snowboarders.  Snowboarders know how to party because of the lack of oxygen in high altitude destinations where they often let it all HANG OUT.

So it’s no surprise that these ultimate party animals surely know how to throw a great bash.  Combining the world’s best musicians with the world’s best snow conditions, the 2012 SNOWMONT Music Festival is the East Coast edition of the S.N.O.W. series, which proposes the ultimate marriage: music and mountains. With multiple stages showcasing the talent of some of today’s most exciting artists, the live music at this year’s SnowMont Festival is sure to satisfy thousands of hungry music fans.

That’s why I made a prediction of who they could have possibly booked for this mega event.  Only the biggest and baddest party bands must be on this wild roster.  So let me take an educated guess on who is in the lineup.


LIMP BIZKIT
Fred Durst may be all business in the front (also due to his male patterned BALDNESS), but he is still all party at heart.  Limp just may get back together for a reunion show to bring the paty animals of SnowMont what they really want: a set that makes gets them in the mood for some NOOKIE.  Plus with Limp Bizkit in the lineup, it kills two birds with one stone by including them as the hip-hop act.

KOTTONMOUTH KINGS
Only a band lacking oxygen to the brain can come up with a band name that risqué.  Or must be on some heavy cottonmouth producing narcotics.  Yep, not all snowboarders have to be into heavy alcohol consumption.  Being an animal also consists of getting totally wasted on recreational brownies, leaf shaped lollipops, and DREADLOCKS for days.  That’s right, the party animal mentality has no bias.  Just as long as you party.

DARUDE
I’m not even certain if Darude is still alive but with their hit SANDSTORM, they have gone down in history as the band to orchestrate the biggest party anthem of all time.  I suggest that after Kottonmouth and Limp are finished with their sets, they Darude go up on stage and just play Sandstorm for like 10 hours straight.  No stopping.

Now let’s look and see if I’m anywhere close to the actual lineup for this year’s SnowMont event.  Check to see after the jump…

DOH!

SnowMont Music Festival 2012 Lineup
Kaskade
Snoop Dogg
Chromeo
Slightly Stoopid
Lotus
Datsik
DJ Shadow
Ott
Gramatik
Easy Star All Stars